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40 questions to ask before nikah

Good marriages start with honest talks. Use these questions with a potential spouse, with your wali or family present where you can.

Tick each one once you have discussed it. Your ticks are saved in this browser only.

40 questions to ask before nikah

0 of 40 discussed

Faith and practice

What does your daily practice look like right now?We discussed this
What part of your faith are you working to grow?We discussed this
How do you hope we will support each other in our deen?We discussed this
Which school of thought or community do you follow, if any?We discussed this
How would you like to spend Ramadan and Eid as a family?We discussed this

Family and wali

How involved do you expect your parents to be in our life?We discussed this
Who is your wali, and how would you like him involved?We discussed this
How often would you want to visit or host family?We discussed this
Do you support anyone in your family now, or expect to later?We discussed this
What does your family expect for mahr and the wedding?We discussed this

Roles and expectations

How do you see the roles of husband and wife at home?We discussed this
Do you plan to work after marriage? How do you feel about your spouse working?We discussed this
How should we share chores and day-to-day decisions?We discussed this
How much time alone, and with friends, do you need?We discussed this
What would make you feel respected in a marriage?We discussed this

Money

Do you have any debt? How do you plan to pay it off?We discussed this
Are you a saver or a spender?We discussed this
How should we handle household costs and big purchases?We discussed this
Do you avoid interest, and how strictly?We discussed this
What are your money goals for the next five years?We discussed this

Children

Do you want children? If so, how many, and when?We discussed this
How were you raised, and what would you do the same or differently?We discussed this
How do you see discipline and setting limits for children?We discussed this
What schooling and Islamic learning would you want for them?We discussed this
If you already have children, how will a new family work for them?We discussed this

Where to live

Which city or country do you want to live in?We discussed this
Would you live with or near your parents?We discussed this
Would you move for work or for family?We discussed this
What kind of home can we afford in the first year?We discussed this
What does a normal weekday at home look like for you?We discussed this

Health and past

Are there health conditions, physical or mental, I should know about?We discussed this
Would you be open to health or genetic screening before nikah?We discussed this
Have you been married or engaged before?We discussed this
Is there anything from your past that could affect our marriage?We discussed this
How do you look after your health day to day?We discussed this

Conflict and communication

How do you act when you are angry or stressed?We discussed this
How did your parents handle disagreements?We discussed this
If we cannot agree, who should we go to for advice?We discussed this
How do you like to be told that you have upset someone?We discussed this
What is one thing you would never accept in a marriage?We discussed this

Halal Match suggests questions for every match

On any profile, open Coach and pick Icebreakers to get opening questions based on both profiles. A good first question makes the rest of these easier.

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This list is general guidance, not religious or professional advice.

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